Child Development
Why Praising Effort Matters More Than Intelligence
Why Praising Effort Matters More Than Intelligence
Learn why praising effort over intelligence fosters resilience, growth, and a love for learning in children, with practical tips for parents.
Learn why praising effort over intelligence fosters resilience, growth, and a love for learning in children, with practical tips for parents.
Challenge
Introduction
Introduction
Results
Comparative Analysis
Table of Contents
Table of Contents
Table of Contents
Category
Category
Child Development
Child Development
Date
Date
Nov 15, 2024
Nov 15, 2024
Time to read
Time to read
3 Minutes
3 Minutes
Tags
Tags
Growth Mindset, Praising Effort, Parenting Strategies
Growth Mindset, Praising Effort, Parenting Strategies
Introduction
Introduction
Kids who are constantly told how smart they are may start to focus on protecting that image. They crave success, but only the kind that comes easy.
Picture this: your child runs to you, glowing with pride. They hold up a drawing of the family dog. “That’s amazing! You’re so talented!” you say, your heart swelling. You mean well, of course. You want them to feel proud. But without knowing it, you might be steering them towards something fragile. They may start caring more about looking smart than about learning something new.
It’s a common mistake. When we praise kids for being “smart,” we can unintentionally push them into what’s called a “fixed mindset.” They begin to believe that their abilities are set in stone. That they can’t change, even with effort. And when kids think this way, they start to fear mistakes. They stop trying new things. They avoid challenges because failure feels like proof they’re not good enough.
Kids who are constantly told how smart they are may start to focus on protecting that image. They crave success, but only the kind that comes easy.
Picture this: your child runs to you, glowing with pride. They hold up a drawing of the family dog. “That’s amazing! You’re so talented!” you say, your heart swelling. You mean well, of course. You want them to feel proud. But without knowing it, you might be steering them towards something fragile. They may start caring more about looking smart than about learning something new.
It’s a common mistake. When we praise kids for being “smart,” we can unintentionally push them into what’s called a “fixed mindset.” They begin to believe that their abilities are set in stone. That they can’t change, even with effort. And when kids think this way, they start to fear mistakes. They stop trying new things. They avoid challenges because failure feels like proof they’re not good enough.
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Kids who are constantly told how smart they are may start to focus on protecting that image. They crave success, but only the kind that comes easy.
Here’s what can happen:
They avoid challenges. If the task looks hard, they won’t risk trying. Better to stay safe than to fail.
They give up easily. Struggling feels like proof they aren’t good enough. So, they stop.
They ignore feedback. A suggestion to improve feels like criticism. They turn away from it, missing chances to grow.
Take Ethan. He was bright and curious. His parents were proud of him, always saying, “You’re so smart!” They thought they were helping. But over time, Ethan began to avoid anything that wasn’t easy. He didn’t want to risk being “not smart.” He stopped trying as hard.
Kids who are constantly told how smart they are may start to focus on protecting that image. They crave success, but only the kind that comes easy.
Here’s what can happen:
They avoid challenges. If the task looks hard, they won’t risk trying. Better to stay safe than to fail.
They give up easily. Struggling feels like proof they aren’t good enough. So, they stop.
They ignore feedback. A suggestion to improve feels like criticism. They turn away from it, missing chances to grow.
Take Ethan. He was bright and curious. His parents were proud of him, always saying, “You’re so smart!” They thought they were helping. But over time, Ethan began to avoid anything that wasn’t easy. He didn’t want to risk being “not smart.” He stopped trying as hard.
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
There’s a way out of this trap. It starts with praising effort instead of intelligence. When we focus on how kids work—how they try, stick with it, and problem-solve—we help them see that abilities aren’t fixed. They grow. This is the essence of a “growth mindset.”
Kids with a growth mindset know that:
Challenges help them grow. They lean into the hard stuff, not away from it.
Struggles are part of learning. They keep going, even when it’s tough.
Mistakes are teachers. They use failures to refine their skills and try again.
The science backs this up. Research shows praising effort leads to better outcomes in Executive Function, Emotional Regulation, Creativity, and Social Skills. It’s clear: effort matters more than talent.
There’s a way out of this trap. It starts with praising effort instead of intelligence. When we focus on how kids work—how they try, stick with it, and problem-solve—we help them see that abilities aren’t fixed. They grow. This is the essence of a “growth mindset.”
Kids with a growth mindset know that:
Challenges help them grow. They lean into the hard stuff, not away from it.
Struggles are part of learning. They keep going, even when it’s tough.
Mistakes are teachers. They use failures to refine their skills and try again.
The science backs this up. Research shows praising effort leads to better outcomes in Executive Function, Emotional Regulation, Creativity, and Social Skills. It’s clear: effort matters more than talent.
How to Shift Your Praise
How to Shift Your Praise
How to Shift Your Praise
How to Shift Your Praise
Changing the way we praise doesn’t take much. It’s about what we choose to highlight.
Praise the process. Talk about the steps they took. “You kept trying different ways until you figured it out!”
Acknowledge perseverance. Celebrate their grit when things got hard. “You didn’t quit even when it was tricky. That’s amazing!”
Be specific. Connect your praise to their effort. “I can see how much you practiced this piano piece. It’s paying off!”
When we praise effort, we tell our kids something important: Success doesn’t come from being born smart. It comes from working hard and learning along the way.
Changing the way we praise doesn’t take much. It’s about what we choose to highlight.
Praise the process. Talk about the steps they took. “You kept trying different ways until you figured it out!”
Acknowledge perseverance. Celebrate their grit when things got hard. “You didn’t quit even when it was tricky. That’s amazing!”
Be specific. Connect your praise to their effort. “I can see how much you practiced this piano piece. It’s paying off!”
When we praise effort, we tell our kids something important: Success doesn’t come from being born smart. It comes from working hard and learning along the way.
Why Effort Matters for Life
Why Effort Matters for Life
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort isn’t just about school. It’s the foundation for skills kids will use every day of their lives:
Executive functions. Planning, focus, self-control—all these grow through effort.
Emotional resilience. Learning to manage frustration and push through hard times builds strength for life.
These skills shape who they become. They help kids form relationships, tackle challenges, and navigate the ups and downs of adulthood. Praising effort gives them a gift that lasts far beyond childhood.
In the grand scheme of childhood, focusing on effort over talent weaves resilience, curiosity, and confidence into their lives. It teaches kids that mistakes are part of growth, that challenges make them stronger, and that their potential is endless.
So let’s change the conversation. Let’s cheer them on for how hard they work, how determined they are, and how much they’re growing. In the end, it’s the effort that will take them the farthest.
Related Topics
Growth Mindset, Parenting Advice
Learn how to raise a smart, happy and moral child with easy-to-understand visuals
Effort isn’t just about school. It’s the foundation for skills kids will use every day of their lives:
Executive functions. Planning, focus, self-control—all these grow through effort.
Emotional resilience. Learning to manage frustration and push through hard times builds strength for life.
These skills shape who they become. They help kids form relationships, tackle challenges, and navigate the ups and downs of adulthood. Praising effort gives them a gift that lasts far beyond childhood.
In the grand scheme of childhood, focusing on effort over talent weaves resilience, curiosity, and confidence into their lives. It teaches kids that mistakes are part of growth, that challenges make them stronger, and that their potential is endless.
So let’s change the conversation. Let’s cheer them on for how hard they work, how determined they are, and how much they’re growing. In the end, it’s the effort that will take them the farthest.
Related Topics
Growth Mindset, Parenting Advice
Learn how to raise a smart, happy and moral child with easy-to-understand visuals
Audio Summary
Audio Summary
Audio overviews (including the voices) are AI-generated.
Audio overviews (including the voices) are AI-generated.
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Study Guide
Study Guide
Including Key Concepts, Quiz & Key Terms
Including Key Concepts, Quiz & Key Terms
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Summary
Summary
01
Introduction
Focusing on innate talent can lead kids to value looking smart over learning, fostering a fixed mindset where mistakes are feared and growth stalls.
02
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Praising intelligence can make kids avoid challenges, give up easily, and resist feedback, prioritizing looking smart over learning and growth.
03
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Shifting praise to effort cultivates a growth mindset, where kids embrace challenges, persist through struggles, and see mistakes as opportunities to improve.
04
How to Shift Your Praise
Focus on the process, perseverance, and specifics of your child’s effort. This approach teaches that success comes from hard work, not fixed abilities.
05
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort builds key skills like self-control and resilience, shaping children into confident, capable individuals prepared for life’s challenges.
01
Introduction
Focusing on innate talent can lead kids to value looking smart over learning, fostering a fixed mindset where mistakes are feared and growth stalls.
02
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Praising intelligence can make kids avoid challenges, give up easily, and resist feedback, prioritizing looking smart over learning and growth.
03
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Shifting praise to effort cultivates a growth mindset, where kids embrace challenges, persist through struggles, and see mistakes as opportunities to improve.
04
How to Shift Your Praise
Focus on the process, perseverance, and specifics of your child’s effort. This approach teaches that success comes from hard work, not fixed abilities.
05
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort builds key skills like self-control and resilience, shaping children into confident, capable individuals prepared for life’s challenges.
01
Introduction
Focusing on innate talent can lead kids to value looking smart over learning, fostering a fixed mindset where mistakes are feared and growth stalls.
02
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Praising intelligence can make kids avoid challenges, give up easily, and resist feedback, prioritizing looking smart over learning and growth.
03
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Shifting praise to effort cultivates a growth mindset, where kids embrace challenges, persist through struggles, and see mistakes as opportunities to improve.
04
How to Shift Your Praise
Focus on the process, perseverance, and specifics of your child’s effort. This approach teaches that success comes from hard work, not fixed abilities.
05
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort builds key skills like self-control and resilience, shaping children into confident, capable individuals prepared for life’s challenges.
01
Introduction
Focusing on innate talent can lead kids to value looking smart over learning, fostering a fixed mindset where mistakes are feared and growth stalls.
02
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Praising intelligence can make kids avoid challenges, give up easily, and resist feedback, prioritizing looking smart over learning and growth.
03
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Shifting praise to effort cultivates a growth mindset, where kids embrace challenges, persist through struggles, and see mistakes as opportunities to improve.
04
How to Shift Your Praise
Focus on the process, perseverance, and specifics of your child’s effort. This approach teaches that success comes from hard work, not fixed abilities.
05
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort builds key skills like self-control and resilience, shaping children into confident, capable individuals prepared for life’s challenges.
01
Introduction
Focusing on innate talent can lead kids to value looking smart over learning, fostering a fixed mindset where mistakes are feared and growth stalls.
02
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Praising intelligence can make kids avoid challenges, give up easily, and resist feedback, prioritizing looking smart over learning and growth.
03
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Shifting praise to effort cultivates a growth mindset, where kids embrace challenges, persist through struggles, and see mistakes as opportunities to improve.
04
How to Shift Your Praise
Focus on the process, perseverance, and specifics of your child’s effort. This approach teaches that success comes from hard work, not fixed abilities.
05
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort builds key skills like self-control and resilience, shaping children into confident, capable individuals prepared for life’s challenges.
01
Introduction
Focusing on innate talent can lead kids to value looking smart over learning, fostering a fixed mindset where mistakes are feared and growth stalls.
02
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Praising intelligence can make kids avoid challenges, give up easily, and resist feedback, prioritizing looking smart over learning and growth.
03
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Shifting praise to effort cultivates a growth mindset, where kids embrace challenges, persist through struggles, and see mistakes as opportunities to improve.
04
How to Shift Your Praise
Focus on the process, perseverance, and specifics of your child’s effort. This approach teaches that success comes from hard work, not fixed abilities.
05
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort builds key skills like self-control and resilience, shaping children into confident, capable individuals prepared for life’s challenges.
01
Introduction
Focusing on innate talent can lead kids to value looking smart over learning, fostering a fixed mindset where mistakes are feared and growth stalls.
02
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Praising intelligence can make kids avoid challenges, give up easily, and resist feedback, prioritizing looking smart over learning and growth.
03
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Shifting praise to effort cultivates a growth mindset, where kids embrace challenges, persist through struggles, and see mistakes as opportunities to improve.
04
How to Shift Your Praise
Focus on the process, perseverance, and specifics of your child’s effort. This approach teaches that success comes from hard work, not fixed abilities.
05
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort builds key skills like self-control and resilience, shaping children into confident, capable individuals prepared for life’s challenges.
01
Introduction
Focusing on innate talent can lead kids to value looking smart over learning, fostering a fixed mindset where mistakes are feared and growth stalls.
02
The Risk of Praising Intelligence
Praising intelligence can make kids avoid challenges, give up easily, and resist feedback, prioritizing looking smart over learning and growth.
03
Effort: The Real Secret to Growth
Shifting praise to effort cultivates a growth mindset, where kids embrace challenges, persist through struggles, and see mistakes as opportunities to improve.
04
How to Shift Your Praise
Focus on the process, perseverance, and specifics of your child’s effort. This approach teaches that success comes from hard work, not fixed abilities.
05
Why Effort Matters for Life
Effort builds key skills like self-control and resilience, shaping children into confident, capable individuals prepared for life’s challenges.
References
References
Medina, J. (2010). Brain Rules for Baby: How to Raise a Smart and Happy Child from Zero to Five. Pear Press.
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